Happy Birthday Jesus!
What will I wear to His
party this year? I am pondering that for advent. A spirit of
submission? That will require a diet and a lot of help I would have
to clean out my cupboards of all the great stuff I insulate myself
with, righteousness, stubbornness, self sufficiency…No I don’t
want to do that, how about wearing Joy, could I go for 24 hours with
Joy on and not get it dirty with my judgmental attitudes that just
seem to come. I guess that will take some help too, gotta get rid of
the feeling of inferiority so I don’t need to think I have to 1 up
on people. Well, I’ll keep working on the list of options to wear
but I think in all of them I will need help. Thank goodness that
Easter showed where to get the help. A thought.
The card this year,
another thought:
“Mary, you want to go to
Bethlehem with me?” “We gotta be there by the end of Dec., It’s
about a 3 or 4 day walk (72 miles) but, I thought we could take 2
weeks and stop and see the sights in Jerusalem since we’re so
close.” “I think it would be good for us to go, the gossip has
gotten pretty harsh since we decided to stick together.”
“Sure Joseph, I can’t
wait to get out of here.” “Do you think we could get a donkey?”
“I would like to take some stuff with us and it’s getting harder
and harder to carry anything on my head with baby growing my belly. “
I don’t know
if they got the donkey but you just can’t find a card without it….
Have you had time to think
about what it may have been like to leave home for good, have a baby,
settle in a new town , start making your friends and one night get
woke up and told to move to Egypt….NOW Seeing the refugees and
the places they have lived near here helps my perspective. When the
enemy is near you go with a piece of fabric wrapped around your
waist, a baby tied to your back, a cloth wrapped around a basin on
your head with some food in it and out the door you run, relocating
to a safer place. The conflicts have stopped in Uganda, but the
refugee camps remain and sometimes the refugees that fled, stay.
Right now the Congolese are fleeing in the south and being relocated
up here in some of the old abandoned camps. Why does man love war?
Okay to keep this 2 pages
like I promised my auntie, I better quite with the reflection.
5 months from now should
find us in a new country. This feels much like awaiting birth. When
you know your life is going to change and you’re excited for it but
you are only imagining the fun, good, happy, times you’re going to
have and not factoring in the diapers, the fussy time the wailing
hours of colic. To have a head start on when this is over I am
soliciting help on What should I pursue next? Please
weigh in! I will need to do something and am
yet a bit confused, so, seeking direction.
Last year Christmas Kate
and Conor were here and we had a great time. They got to see what
our life is like and I think were surprised at that. We spent some
great time sweating in Zanzibar and walked under the brilliant
canopy of stars at night. It was enchanting and such a gift.
When we parted we thought
we would see each other in Oct. Now, it has been a year later. We
just celebrated our Christmas in Turkey over Thanksgiving which
somehow seemed appropriate. We had a splendid time together. It was
colder than we expected but we figured out how to wear enough clothes
to stay pretty warm and what old building was heated to get out of
the wind and mist. .
So in this a year what was
the high point what was the low?
Low,
was talking with a mother about her son. She had spent 6 months
sleeping under his bed in the hospital, with her 6 month old, and 6
year old, caring for all the needs of each of them without a break.
She had received $35/month from the driver of the lorry he fell off,
but the $ stopped and she had to beg. We sat together and I
explained that he was dying and needed to return to the village so
she could look after her home, gardens, chickens and goats there and
care for him until he died at home. She took a week to decide to do
this and by then her son’s pneumonia was taking his life very
quickly. The morning we were going to take him to the village, he
died. I accompanied her to the village with her bundle of stuff,
child on her back and one in hand and I cried. And I asked God why
do I have so much? He and I have been working on that answer. I
want to be generous but I always find that I put my expectations on
what poverty and need should look like and weigh the if’s and but’s
until I feel numb and confused and don’t want to do anything in the
fear that it is the wrong thing. Reading When
Helping Hurts (book) gave me some guidelines
on making decisions but I often go back to my judgments and I fear
they are not how Jesus would respond. But as I said, We are working
on it.
High
point was the decision to extend our time here. To say goodbye to the
class that came a week before we did and would graduate in May felt
like the right thing to do. Tom agreed although his job has not been
what he hoped. The culture is so different here that jobs aren’t
what most of us hope. Our standard of progress is different and not
shared by those here. So, most jobs, 99% are difficult, if coming
from the W. If you have time he will talk about that when we see you
again. So, school was the focus for me from Feb till Oct. Peace
Corps had the COS (Close of Service) conference at a 5star hotel and
we said goodbye to those leaving for the next thing in life and it
was nice to know we were staying. It felt right!
When the volunteers
here left, who we did language together and spent 6 days a week with
for 3 months we had Tuna Tuesday with and celebrations together, I
felt sad. I was at the post office the other day and didn’t want to
go back to the school yet so I was going to stop at my friend’s
office to visit, but walking that direction I remembered she had
left. Every volunteer that I knew well has gone home. The new
volunteers that are here are under 25 and their interests are not the
same as ours. Missionary friends started leaving in Oct too so by
Nov. I questioned what life would look like now.
May 23, we ring the gong
at Peace Corps and off we go to the airport. It will fly by, I know,
and it has been an enlightening experience giving me time and help to
question a lot of things I use to hold as truth. My faith has
remained in Jesus as the only hope of eternal life, but the view has
softened about the great mercies of God.
OH YEA, the kids: Sorry
Auntie this is dragging on.
Jake and Heather have
relocated to Maryland. Jake was offered a position with a lawyer
there to assist with his Constitution Law work. He gives classes and
Jake is working with that department. Heather will be homeschooling
and the kids will be growing without us. So this will be a priority
to correct when we return.
Kate is employed at the
company in DC that does global projects with grants and loans to
country’s from the US. She is 21/2 years there. She would like to
do field work in another country but competition is very stiff. She
has had some interview but no job yet.
Conor is in Turkey
studying, although he says the class load is not challenging him he
is meeting many students from Asia and Europe which he can talk about
politics on a grander scale and get some views that aren’t colored
by the same values we hold in the US. He is having a good time
debating and listening. He will finish Hamline in May and will meet
Tom and I in Germany to start a bike ride to the Black Sea along the
Danube River. If you look at a map the trail goes through Austria,
Hungry, then becomes the border between Serbia, Bulgaria, &
Romania. We are going to bike and train it. I really don’t think
I will get to the sea, but we are hopeful. My time line is 2 weeks.
Then I turn around and go back to Netherlands. We want to start
seeing friends and Europe until a MacAulay family reunion at the
shore of New Jersey in late August. So, that is when we plan on
coming back to the US. We will see what God has planned.
We have met so many great
people while here. I have learned to cook Indian food because we
have an abundance of organic vegetables, I can cook and bake on a
charcoal stove (it just takes hours), I can greet my neighbors in
their language,( but don’t ask me any questions) I have been to
many wedding and introductions, sat in church where the whole
congregation is a choir and makes my voice sound great, watched
babies born and people die. Do I understand the 3rd
world, no, but I have a better idea of what can work and what
doesn’t. I am grateful for the tax payers who have made this
possible for us to come, see, and experience. We will be here for the
holiday and PC is sending up 7 new education volunteers on the 21st.
We will have a celebration here on the 24th
with more wild rice soup. I will think of you on Christmas when it is
in the 90’s and 15 people are coming for a meal as I cook on
charcoal… But I wouldn’t trade it except for a day with the
grandkids sliding down the hills of New Ulm.
I hope you all find
something nice to wear to Jesus Birthday party.
Love to you as you ponder
Christmas…. IN HIM, Marcy and Tom
Sorry Auntie I just
couldn’t get it shorter…
